This One Subtle Shift Will Help You FINALLY Manifest Your Desires
Updated: Aug 22, 2019
Do you have a goal (or five) that you’ve been carrying around for as long as you can remember? Perhaps you’ve wanted to lose that extra weight for the last decade, or you’ve wanted to start your own business, or maybe you still haven’t given up on the idea of manifesting your dream relationship.
Most of us have unfulfilled desires in at least one of these three categories: health, finances, or relationships. And yet these are the areas where we can never seem to make real, lasting progress.
Why is that?
Are we inherently broken in these key areas? Is this just our personal cross to bear, given that we have success in so many other areas of our lives? Are we not deserving of this level of accomplishment and security? Are we just not trying hard enough?
The problem isn’t a lack of worthiness or even effort. It actually has more to do with what you’re focusing your attention on. For example, if your never-to-be-accomplished goal has been to lose a significant amount of weight, what are the thoughts that are driving you to that goal? When you think to yourself “I really want to lose this extra weight,” are you thinking about how great it would feel to be running around in your bathing suit without a care in the world, or are you thinking about how tired you are of seeing that extra fat around your belly, and trying to find clothes that will hide it?
These thoughts create very different feelings for the thinker. One comes from a place of anticipation and expectation, while the other comes from a place of avoidance. Put another way, the first option is focusing on what you DO want, whereas the second option is focusing on what you DON’T want.
This may seem like a silly distinction but stay with me as we look at this from another angle.
Think for a moment about an area of your life where you usually get what you want. Are you the type of person who always earned good grades in school while others struggled to get C’s? Do you have a better than average driving record? Do you find it fun and exciting to make friends in new social settings? Well count yourself lucky because those are strengths that not everyone possesses.
Most of us can think of at least a handful of areas where we don’t struggle, and we find it surprising when others do struggle in these areas. For whatever reason, these skills come more easily to us. Just like that skinny friend who can’t understand why everyone else is always on a diet.
And for that reason, we don’t ever really worry about it not working out for us - at least not in these arenas. In essence, we are focusing on what we do want, instead of what we fear, because we know we have the ability to get there. The social butterfly doesn’t stress about going into a new social setting. The excellent driver doesn't fear getting into an accident.
They EXPECT these things to go their way. And so they do.
So how do we harness that kind of self-confidence in the areas where we feel less than competent? Here are three steps, based on the Law of Attraction, that will help you finally break through your stuck points.
1. Define what it is that you WANT
Grab a pen and paper and actually write down the thing that you want. Notice that I did not say to write down a ‘goal’. This isn’t a goal to be accomplished. This is your desire. So instead of writing “I want to lose 30lbs”, write about how you want to feel: “I want to feel totally comfortable in my skin”.
2. Imagine how you will feel when you are living that new reality
This is the fun part but it can feel hard at first. Let’s say you really want to open your own consulting business. Imagine what a day in the life will look like, and then focus on how that experience makes you feel. Do you feel freer? Does your chest swell with anticipation? Go to these thoughts as often as you can throughout the day. Visualization is one of the most powerful tools we have as humans.
3. Be open to new ways of getting there
When we have goals that seem unattainable, we tend to get rigid in our ideas about WHAT it is that we need to accomplish to be happy as well as HOW to get there. For example, if your goal has been to feel great in a bathing suit, you may believe that the only way to get there is to lose a certain number of pounds. But that’s only one possible avenue. There are lots of other ways to feel great in a bathing suit, like surrounding yourself with people who recognize how beautiful you already are, or lifting weights to feel stronger and more toned (not necessarily lighter), or getting a tummy tuck for that one problem area that you have.
That’s not to mention all the ways you might lose weight without dieting that you’ve probably never fully considered; like meditating or treating your body with more kindness through nutrition and gentle exercise. Trust me, the solutions are endless when we truly open ourselves up to other possibilities.
So instead of mentally berating yourself for missing the mark on one of your long-held desires, take a deep breath and start again. Whatever we focus on will come to us. Stop focusing on what you don’t want, and intentionally focus on what you do want. Slowly but surely you will manifest your deepest desires, and the process will be a lot more fun than you ever imagined.